Looking through some old files I found two letters (30 years old). I sat and wondered just what became of those who wrote them. It concerns their sexuality and if you are rather faint hearted you can stop reading now. Let me quote both of them. They were addressed to me.
“I’ve never discussed my not being a virgin with anyone except my very best friend. She doesn’t understand because she thinks sex is a laughing matter. I’m serious about sex because I’m not a virgin and haven’t been for almost a year and one-half. I’m 13 years old and really ashamed.
I enjoy sex very much and really haven’t got the will power to stop haven’t it. It’s hard to refuse sex when you’re in a nice house with a bed and a guy you think you are in love with.
Last summer I thought I was pregnant. I only told two people, my best friend and the guy at the time I was dating. When I told him, he said it was my fault. I got myself into it and I can get myself out. I really thought I was in love with him, but he didn’t care about me, even if I were pregnant with his baby.
I’m trying to live the Christian life, but I feel ashamed and dirty, because I am not a virgin and have sex anytime I can. I really do need someone to talk with who understands. If you can answer this letter – if you have the time, I would appreciate it.”
When I first read the letter, I called to my wife, “get out my typewriter”. She said, “Are you going to type a letter?” I replied, “Nope, I’m going to write a book.” The letter formed the dedication of the book entitled, “Sex, Person or Performance?”
Reread this part of her letter again, “It’s hard to refuse sex when you’re in a nice house with a bed and a guy that you think you are in love with!” Since 85 per cent of all sexual encounters on national networks last year were outside of marriage, you may well understand why this same definition (House, bed, guy, love) is shared with so many of our kids today.
Here is a letter from a 17 year old. It begins, “Dear brother Jack, you won’t remember me, but I’m one of the kids from the Christian College. Jesus and I both thank you for coming to our school. You allowed God to become more real to each of us here.”
“Brother Jack, I know you must be terribly busy, but I pray you will take time to read this letter and answer it. You seem like an open minded man who can take the truth without a lot of excuses. That’s the kind of person I want to talk to.”
“A year and a half ago, I was engaged to a really great guy. He was used to sex in his every day life, but he fell in love with me because I was a virgin and determined to stay that way. He wanted me to stay that way until we got married, but when you’re in a parked car, late Friday night out in the country; it’s easy to forget your determination – too easy.”
“The entire next two days, I spent wandering around in nature, praying, reading God’s Word and crying. He tried to kill himself. It was two months later, after several pleas for him to give his life to Jesus that we broke up. He said he couldn’t become a Christian, and I couldn’t marry one that wasn’t.”
“Then last summer I got back together with an old boy friend. We started going steady and spending a lot of time together. It wasn’t planned, but one day it just happened. We had sex together. I almost had a mental breakdown and it wasn’t too much later that I found out I was pregnant. For days I did nothing but to pray to God for a miscarriage and in days, God answered my prayer.”
“I’m sorry about what I did, brother Jack, but I’m not ashamed of my baby. I know some people will say it can’t be called a baby or a human being, because it wasn’t old enough – it was only a handful. But to me it was something very special. As much as it is possible, I love my baby with all my heart.”
Oh brother Jack, I needed to talk to a Christian about this for a long, long time.”
She had more to say, but this part of her letter is enough. As I reviewed these old documents, I just thought maybe, just maybe, as old as these letter are, they might just help some teenager today. Times change, people change, but the principles of truth remain unchanged.
The world has its own standard and so does God. Paul writes to the Ephesian church and said, “Be ye therefore followers of God, as dear children. Walk in love, as Christ also has loved us, and has given himself for us as an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweet smelling savior. But fornication, and all uncleanness, or covetousness, let it not once be named among you as becoming saints” (Ephesians 5:1-5). Read the rest of it out of your own Bible. Believers need to take a stand in this present world.