“Divorced… Now What?”

This article is part 1 of 9 in the series Divorce and Remarriage

   (Presently updating this series)
   This series is being offered simply and solely to offer hope and healing to the broken hearted. This is not an easy thing to deal with, and should not be treated lightly. Yet the church continues to be faced with this. We are not dealing with ‘things’, we are dealing with hearts. “Have you been through divorce?” asks someone? The answer is sadly yes. I understand a little more about the broken hearted David. “Have mercy upon me, O God, according to thy lovingkindness: According to the multitude of thy tender mercies blot out my transgressions. 2  Wash me thoroughly from mine iniquity, And cleanse me from my sin. 3  For I know my transgressions; And my sin is ever before me. 4  Against thee, thee only, have I sinned, And done that which is evil in thy sight; That thou mayest be justified when thou speakest, And be clear when thou judgest.
5  Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity; And in sin did my mother conceive me.
6  Behold, thou desirest truth in the inward parts; And in the hidden part thou wilt make me to know wisdom. 7 Purify me with hyssop, and I shall be clean: Wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow. 8  Make me to hear joy and gladness, That the bones which thou hast broken may rejoice. 9  Hide thy face from my sins, And blot out all mine iniquities. 10  Create in me a clean heart, O God; And renew a right spirit within me.
11  Cast me not away from thy presence; And take not thy holy Spirit from me.  (Psalm 51:1-8). 

   Yet there is hope for the broken, penetent and contrite heart…

David found forgiveness… Psalms 32:1  Blessed is he whose transgression is forgiven, Whose sin is covered. 2  Blessed is the man unto whom Jehovah imputeth not iniquity, And in whose spirit there is no guile. 3  When I kept silence, my bones wasted away Through my groaning all the day long. 4  For day and night thy hand was heavy upon me: My moisture was changed as with the drought of summer. Selah 5  I acknowledged my sin unto thee, And mine iniquity did I not hide: I said, I will confess my transgressions unto Jehovah; And thou forgavest the iniquity of my sin.
What precipitated David’s ‘about face’ in his life? David met the prophet…Nathan who accuses and convicts him not only of adultery, but murder as well! David’s heart crumbles before Nathan and into the arms of the Righteous God, who in turn forgives. Were there consequences? Yes, but was he forgiven? Yes. This is the ‘mainest thing’, right?!  
   Is there hope for you, for me and others? Yes, but it rests in humbly repenting and confessing sin… not in pridefully denying it. Beginning again, means having a starting point. David found his… I found mine… you can find yours. As with all sin repented of, must come the promise, “Never again Lord, never again.”


   Most every person who knows something about the Bible knows what is said regarding divorce. Just a casual look at Matthew 5 and Matthew 19 shows that the Lord is against it, and didn’t approve of how the religious leaders were handling this. Obviously divorce is not a good thing, it hurts, it wounds, it destroys… there’s just nothing good about it. Bottom line… it is not easy!
   People don’t just wake up on a bright sunny morning and say, “Well, we’ve been together for a few years now, why don’t we go down and get a divorce.” Couples who go through this crisis have been and are hurting.   
   The questions start pouring in, problems multiply from everywhere but unfortunately, many in the church who mean well, offer little comfort or help with traditional views.
   It is not the purpose of this writing to pretend that I have all the answers or that there is some magic potion which will make all problems, hurts, and relationships will somehow all be made right. I just don’t. I do understand the feelings, struggles, and many problems because I have been through marriage failures. I am not proud of it, and am truly sorry and repent for breaking my Master’s heart, and won’t do it again. My purpose in sharing this and writing, is that today the church is truly facing a serious problem with so many going through marriage failure. 
   I truly want to help those who have travelled down this ‘road of tears’. Who was the ‘guilty party’? Who did what and when? These are important questions, however the bottom line is, when divorce ocures, there is sin, somewhere. Either in action, or attitude and words or all of these together. Paul said, “All have sinned and fallen short of God’s glory” (Romans 3:23).
   I have never believed that the answer is in trying to ‘unscramble the eggs’ when this is not the Bible plan of ‘forgiveness’. Considering the First Century church and the circumstances surrounding its spreading throughout the Roman world, it is truly amazing that the Apostles handled questions of immorality, divorce and remarriage, with more simplicity than people have today.
   What I want everyone to understand at the outset is there is hope and forgiveness for all who sin, through the finished work of Jesus. He still saves “to the uttermost” all who seek Him.  
   Read what the Bible says is required for forgiveness (Acts 2:38-39 for those outside of Christ wanting ‘in’, and 1 Corinthians 6:9-11). (For Christians, Acts 8:22; I John 1:9). 
   Ever since I was in preacher’s school, and I ‘hitched’ a ride back and forth to and from school, with a good friend of mine, Harold Thomas. We would have ‘mini-debates’ on this topic…. I never believed adultery was an unforgivable sin or that peole who have divorced and remarried must separate to be or remain saved. 
   The question of the Christian, “Now what?” is addressed by God’s grace in response to Godly sorrow, repentance, and determination to NEVER, do it again.
Now it’s time to get back and serve the Lord.
   More later….


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