“I’m Fine”

The nurse called the next patient. She said, “And how are you today?” The answer was just the same as the four that had been called before. “I’m fine!” I sat there and thought, “If everyone’s fine, what are we doing in a doctor’s office”.
Don’t get turned off on the term, “I’m fine”. If you were to answer by giving the litany of hurts and aches and problems, 80 percent would care less, and the other 20 percent would rejoice in the fact that you are worse off than they are. Just say, “I’m fine” and let it go.
I received this story from my brother Tom. He’s 83 years old but still has a great sense of humor. It will illustrate the point of this column.

“A farmer named ‘Clyde’ had a car accident. In court, the trucking company’s fancy lawyer was questioning Clyde.”
“Didn’t you say at the scene of the accident, “I’m fine?” asked the lawyer.
Clyde responded, “Well, I’ll tell you what happened. I had just loaded my favorite mule, Bessie, into the . . .”
“I didn’t ask for any details”, the lawyer interrupted, just answer the question. Did you not say at the scene of the accident, “I’m fine?”
Clyde said, “Well, I had just got Bessie into the trailer and I was driving down the road…”
The lawyer jumped to his feet and interrupted again and said, “Your honor, if you please, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the local county sheriff on the scene that he was just fine. Now several weeks after the accident, he is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud. Please instruct the witness to just answer the question.”
By this time the judge was fairly interested in Clyde’s answer and said to the lawyer, “I’d like to hear what he has to say about his favorite mule Bessie.”
Clyde thanked the judge and proceeded, “Well, as I was saying, I had just loaded Bessie, my favorite mule, into the trailer and was driving her down the highway when this huge semi-truck and trailer ran the stop sign and smacked my truck right in the side. I was thrown into one ditch and Bessie was thrown into the other. I was hurting real bad and didn’t want to move. However, I could hear Bessie moaning and groaning. I knew she was in terrible shape by the tone of her groans. Shortly after the accident the county sheriff came on the scene. He could hear Bessie moaning and groaning, so he went over to her. After he looked at her he took out his gun and shot her dead between the eyes.
Then the Sheriff came across the road, smoking gun in hand and looked down at me, and said “And how are you feeling???”
“Now Judge, your honor, what would you have said?”

The apostle Paul wrote something along this line. “Not that I speak in regard to need, for I have learned in whatever state I am, therewith to be content” (Philippians 4:10). The old saying is, “if you tell people how you feel, you’re liable to get shot!”. One poet put it this way;


“There is nothing whatever the matter with me,
I’m just as healthy as I can be.
I have arthritis in back and knees,
And when I talk, I talk with a wheeze.
My pulse is weak and my blood is thin,
But I’m awfully well for the shape I’m in.
My teeth eventually had to come out,
And my diet I hate to think about.
I’m overweight and I can’t get thin,
But I’m awfully well for the shape I’m in.
I think my liver is out of whack,
I’ve got a pain high up in my back.
Sleep is denied me night after night,
And every mornin’ I’m just a sight.
My memory is failing, my head’s in a spin,
But I’m awfully well for the shape I’m in.
The moral of this story as the tale we unfold,
For you and me that are growing old,
It’s better to say, “I’M FINE” with a grin,
Than to let folks know the real shape we’re in.
by:Constance O’Neon, 1953.

   Martin Camrud wrote, “So here’s to happy days and a peaceful hours. Trust in God. Live a simple life. Free your heart from hate. Scatter sunshine. Fill your life with love. Do not worry. Forget self and think of others. Expect little and give much. Keep your head cool, your feet warm and your bowls open.”
Keep your spirit alive and do these things and you’ll survive. Always do what’s right and be kind. Smile at the world and just say, “I’M FINE!


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