There is a war going on quite literally in the Christian’s life. The struggle between the spirit and the flesh, light and darkness, good and evil. Every Christian experiences this struggle to some extent. Some grow weary along the way as the ‘pull of the dark side’ seems constant. Recalling the time when they first heard of Jesus and His sacrifice for sins of the world, surrendering to Him, and being born of “water and the Spirit” (John 3:3-5; Acts 2:37-39). Remembering the joy of realizing his sins are forgiven, and the debt is paid. Filled with hope and joy at this new beginning… HEAVEN BOUND, right?

Once there was a scientist who performed a ‘creepy’ experiment of joining a spider and a butterfly. The spider of course seeks for the dark corners to do it’s thing, while the butterfly longs to fly free. The tug of war is obviously a threat Which will ‘win’? Will the butterfly finally give up (die) and get dragged to the darkness, or will the spider give up (die) and trail along as the butterfly flies away into the sky. Which will overpower the other?

God help us, this is (my) struggle, and just maybe it’s yours.

Paul expresses something about this in Romans 7:21-25. I want to do the right thing, but I don’t. I want to soar into the blue sky but I cannot. There is a war going on. God help us, please. Of course, all the work, sacrifice, has been done. So why do I feel so lost? “O wretched man that I am! WHO will deliver me from this body if death?” Listen friend, it’s all about JESUS.

Now to my title text! Ephesians 4:17-24

“This I say, therefore, and testify in the Lord, that you should no longer walk as the rest of the Gentiles walk, in the futility of their mind, (18) having their understanding darkened, being alienated from the life of God, because of the ignorance that is in them, because of the blindness of their heart; (19) who, being past feeling, have given themselves over to lewdness to work all uncleanness with greediness.

B.T.D.T., simply put… “been there done that!”
Paul says, “All have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God, ” Romans 3:23. The hurt, shame, guilt? What is one who “knows better” to do? Giving up while being a temptation, is not an option. Prayer for forgiveness and depending on His love and grace provides a new start. “Confess your sins one to another and pray for one another that you can be healed. The effectual (effective) fervent (sincere, showing emotions) prayer of a righteous man (through the blood of Christ), avails (accomplishes) much.” James 5:16.

How could we live as Christians without HOPE (desire plus expectation)? Who can we turn to, if not to a “righteous man” to intercede for us? “Some things are better left unsaid,” but this is far better than “bottling things up.” FIND A RIGHTEOUS BROTHER (one who won’t blab on Facebook (anonymously) AND CONFESS AND HAVE HIM PRAY FOR YOU. “Burdens are lifted at Calvary.” Let a brother lead you there.

Avoid at all costs having a ‘darkened” mind. Don’t ‘cut yourself off’ but seek reconciliation.
B.T.D.T.
Grow in grace!

Our dream, our hope growing up was to have a place we could just ‘stay put!’ The church in general really doesn’t know what preacher families go through. They don’t understand the inner-struggle and feelings of instability the preacher-family has to live with. Almost anything can be a reason for having the dreaded-elder-meeting where the preacher hears the words, “it’s time for a change in preachers.” Of course this is ‘couched’ in acceptable, comforting language. However the end result is the same, since dad would come home and first talk with mom, “Honey, it looks like we are going to move again.” Then the news to us kids. Mom cried and we spoke out! “We don’t want to move!” “We just settled in, and have friends!” “It cannot be helped,” dad would say. So, we will be moving as soon as we find anther church. End result? NO ROOTS!

Not trying to give the idea that we were not grateful, but speaking as a PK (preacher’s kid), we didn’t like moving. It seemed to happen every 3-5 years. Our best time was 1964-1968 when we moved from the States to do mission work in Ireland. We went through adjustments of course, but looking back, the adventure was fun. New schools? Again, a bit difficult, but still the adventure was there. Learning to drive on the wrong side of the road, double-decker-busses, fish and chips, new sites, girls(!), English candy(!), fresh cooked breads and butter with honey, camping in the Mountains of Mourne (that sweep down to the sea, vacations to different parts of Ireland, more girls(!). It was a chance to settle down and be somewhat normal. We (kids) were the ‘novelties,’ as Americans were respected by most.

I went to a school called METHODIST COLLEGE BELFAST, (high school), where we had daily ‘Religious class,’ where they used the Bible (of course the in-school priest taught). I think I was a bit of a pain to him since ‘I knew more Bible than most.’ My brothers went to ANNADALE (high school) and the two schools were competitive ‘enemies’ in football (soccer), rugby etc… There are many more memories and photos, but I tell you this because we had our own place, (76 Gilnahirk Road), and a feeling of what it was like to be settled.

“Things change!” However, the adventure of a foreign mission field, and establishing the East Side Church of Christ (Belfast), was successful and still exists.

Bottom line… being a PK has its ups and downs… The dream… MOVE NO MORE! Settle down, establish roots, make friends (real friends) like other people did. This finally happened after dad retired from local work, and started his TUD ministry. No more moving… mom and dad had their own place, and we had a place called home. Even though by that time, we kids had grown up, gotten married, and moved out (except for Bob who stuck around for several years till he got married).

I can’t over-state the importance to the preacher family, the need for buying their own place. Churches mean well having a PH (preacher’s house). Usually behind the building. “We just want to help the preacher and our small congregation.” Well, good intentions or not, it is wiser to help a preacher family get started in their own place. It gives a sense of belonging being the main benefit. Don’t hire someone with the idea, “If we don’t like them, they can move.” This is true of course, but why hire someone with this in mind? Preaching is hard enough on the PF (preacher’s family), so really try to plan on a preacher staying, working out problems, growing together. Love the PF. Treat them well. Don’t allow the church gossiper to continue undermining the church or the preacher. Don’t expect the PKs to be perfect!!! They are not perfect! They are kids. Relax around the PKs and just encourage them. The church in general has a hard enough time winning the world to Christ, much less trying to change preachers every time a well-to-do member gets his/her feathers ruffled. Do your job elders. Correct and discipling the gossiper, disgruntled, trouble-makers. Protect your preacher and PF. Give people ‘elbow room’ and grow together!

There’s much more to all this and maybe I ‘ll get one of those ’round-to-its’ and write more. If not, I’ll leave you with this… Grow in grace, together!